A Farewell from Ron Andersen's Mothers
A salute to all of you. We are all the mothers of Ron Andersen. We could not leave the scene without saying good-bye to you, that would be very impolite.
By the way, talking about education, you do not know how often I said to my son, when Ron was still small (in years, I mean), that he should be careful about the people with whom he wanted to be in contact, that he had to select them with great care. "Ronnie," I said to him, "people will judge you by the company you keep."
This was all in vain. As if the Chinese Great Dane and the Cartoon-Man Britisher were not enough, he has added quite a number of personae non gratae to his continuously growing many-headed VuGraph monster. As this concerto is coming to
an end, the orchestra has been further enriched.
There is a gentleman (so to speak) with the physiognomy of a Japanese Sumo-wrestler and a soporific voice. For anyone with sleeping problems these days, ten minutes in the Vugraph Theatre, with him doing the commentary, would do. (Rumors say that there were even people there, who did not wake up until two boards had been played in the next round).
And as if this was all, another Very Important Man (V.I.M) appeared, with his head held high and an accent and manners
as if he just tied up his horse outside the hotel reception. He must be important, because the Cartoon Man stays awake when he is present and besides, he says all sorts of things, more or less at fault, and the others always agree with him.
"How can you bid 4C on these cards? This is sheer nonsense!" says the Cowboy. "Ehh...in fact 4C is asking for four-card suits," specifies the Chinese. "Aha, it's asking for four-cards; I had not understood that." Fifteen seconds later, still the same hand, the Cowboy again, "But how can you bid 4C on these cards?"
In my view, he must have had a long journey and is still jet-lagged. I feel sure that the two-headed monster, the Cartoon Chinese (Cartoonese?), will probably be re-engaged, as they always agree with the V.I.M.
I am not too happy, however, that my son has included him into his dark realm. But, since Ron is a big boy now, and has outgrown finesses and simple play of simple hands, I guess I have to leave it up to him. He has encouraged me to see a gentleman with a kilt, who has made some rather indecent remarks through the bulletin. I am speechless, but I guess Ronnie just didn't want me around in the pit hole any more, so maybe I will take him by the hilt and see if there's a tilt in the kilt.
Excuse me, but I really have to go now. I would not want to miss the Monday night duplicate at my own club. 12-15 tables and very competitive. Frankly, I am not sure if any of the pairs playing here would win there. My son normally finishes last, even with all his squeezes and stuff!
Good-bye.Ma Andersen in personae